I believe you will always be a part of me

[austin_dern]

A couple people have asked just when I'm going back to Singapore. That could be taken as a sign they're a bit tired of me, but I'd prefer to suppose it's natural curiosity about someone they like. I've been using various levels of indirection but it's been a month now and there's really no point to being so evasive. The truth is: I don't know if I'll ever go back to Singapore.

My university job was as a ``Teaching Fellow'' or ``Visiting Fellow'', a non-tenure track position given out on one- or two-year contracts. That's what I'd been living on from 2003, and probably I could have carried on like that indefinitely in my old department. It was a small department, and my contract began in March, so that they'd either have to pay me to do nothing for half a term or find people to cover the half of my classes I wouldn't be there for, or else just hire me for another year. But when my original department was closed I was put in a larger one with not such a shortage of teaching talent, and my contract was realigned with the semester break, and after years of having me as a Visiting Fellow they apparently got tired of having quite so much company.

I ran a quick job hunt within Singapore, but despite a nibble from a bank hoping to expand its training departments, nobody hired me (though another university has asked my references for referals). And since I was living in faculty housing, and on an employment pass as foreign talent, losing my job meant losing my apartment and leaving the country. For the time being I'm staying with my parents, sorting through an absurd number of boxes of the books and DVDs and miscellaneties that I gathered over years in Singapore, and trying to send out applications to find steady new work.

In any case I really am doing fine. I'm annoyed to lose the hangouts and habits I'd built up over years, and I'm worried about things like my finances (I'm really, objectively, fine; I just don't like the uncertainty) and how to feign having a personality here when I can't as easily slip in Singaporean curiosa. (Singapore's Parliament has decided to allow ministers to make speeches in more than one of the four official languages in the same speech. Up to now they could only use one -- their choice -- per speech. It's only a temporary change, but could be made permanent with the right changes in standing rules.) And I do hope that I'll soon find a new, full-time, preferably tenure-track job.

Trivia: The earliest known public entertainment in Singapore was an 1831 violin recital given by a Signor Masoni. Source: The Singapore Book of Records, Ong Eng Huat, Publisher.

Currently Reading: World's Best Science Fiction: 1966, Edited by Donald A Wollheim, Terry Carr.

Comments

[xolo.livejournal.com]

I'd sort of guessed that, although you seemed reticient to mention it, so I didn't. On the bright side, you could attend Morphicon in May.

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

Well, and, with all the people who have actual problems I don't want to clog things up with my petty issues. It hurts to lose my job, but it's not as if I needed a new one urgently for anything besides my feeling that I should be doing something with my day besides watching Deep Space Nine reruns on Spike.

Time won't abide being beaten

[lexomatic.livejournal.com]

Obviously, you could better spend your time researching that (eventually best-selling) book on the history of statistical mechanics. And working on the leavening humorous passages. Those will need a few beta-readers and revisions, I think.

Re: Time won't abide being beaten

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

That's a thought that's come to mind. Writing that much at length and bringing life to a really dry subject is ... challenging, though. It's nice to have some easy work to fall back on.

Questions!

[sennard.livejournal.com]

I haven't asked myself, but I'm sure the answer to the Singapore Question you mentioned is merely that folks were surprised that you've been available for conversations so much these days! (not that this is a bad thing!)

Re: Questions!

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

That's what I prefer to believe, too, thank you.

[gafennec.livejournal.com]

*HUG* I got the good vibe/mojo going for you! I hope you hear something soon!

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I hope something comes through.

[gafennec.livejournal.com]

It should. Just keep plugging away my friend.

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

Plugging away is fine; the problem is it's no way to riches.

[bunny-hugger.livejournal.com]

My department, too, is downsizing, and I won't know for sure who's getting the axe for another month or two. I am in the same position as you -- I'm on a one-year, non-tenure-track, renewable position. I knew that a tenure-track position was going to be opening in this department soon and hoped to apply for it, but I recently learned that they will be advertising for a specialization that I do not possess.

It would be comfortable to stay here forever, assuming I could build up enough regard among the so-called "regular" faculty to survive any future job cuts. I like it here, and I like living where I live, and Lucky likes his job and has no particular desire to move. But really, I know that I should not resign myself to a non-tenure-track job forever. And the only way to avoid getting in that rut indefinitely (as I have seen others do) is to move on, sooner or later. I'd prefer it be at a time of my choosing (which unfortunately isn't how it happened for you), but someday I know I'll have to say goodbye to Lansing, and perhaps (very regrettably) to Michigan.

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

You've been in my mind too. The department I was in in Singapore actively is hiring a tenure-track position, but they decided that my specialties were too distant from anyone else's to make it worth hiring through that slot, since what's the value in having only one guy in a particular sub-field?

I'm particularly annoyed that the loss of my old job immediately meant the loss of my apartment and the need to leave Singapore, although given the high cost of non-subsidized housing it would be much harder to do a job hunt from there without shattering my savings. And much as I like it in Singapore the need for a tenure-track or at least reasonably stable job would probably have made me start putting out applications seriously this year regardless. I just hate being kicked into it.

[chefmongoose.livejournal.com]

I was thinking "My, this is rather a long-lasting vacation for him, isn't the new semester about to start?"

The department shuffle cuasing lack of job is a bummer, I know that'd been a worry of yours. The contractual date-realignment, well.. no beauracracy lets such things slip forever, not even a university one. Blah.

Financial concern is one of the reasons obviously to look for another job; second being a good reason to get out of the house and away from cats and parents.

Now, in the meantime, you're only 3-4 hours away, and so, you and I shall arrange some sort of visit now that there's not a Vacation-Cram aspect to your time. If you're perchance free and able to borrow vehicle for a weekend. Spotweld is having one of his board-game meets on Sunday the 28th, and you're welcome to come up here for the weekend then (or anytime with 24-hour notice to get the guest room in order).

The best of luck while back stateside.

--Chiaroscuro

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the invitation. I am going to spend some time up there imposing on you, I just don't know quite when yet.

What Do You Want?

[reptilemammal.livejournal.com]

Once more this is the classic question I pose to anyone looking for new opportunity, as you mentioned you have some money saved so this is good but it can go fast.

If the job is no longer available, what kind of work do you really want to do? Do you want to check out other countries? Is there something in the local community you can do freely and volunteer that you would like.

Do you need a nice long vacation, what do you want to do now, are you ready to answer?

Re: What Do You Want?

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

I like teaching, and writing, and generally speaking explaining things. I'd prefer a job in which I was paid to do these things, ideally with few really rigid schedules -- academic or academic-style jobs. I'm obviously open to jobs in other countries, but I can't deny how I'd like to get back to Singapore.

People have tried telling me I should take a vacation, but I'm not a naturally vacation-prone person. I feel awkward taking a day off; taking an indefinite time away from any responsibilities is disquieting.

[bailiff.livejournal.com]

Oh, no! :(

Here I was hoping, should I succeed in finding employment down South, that I would have someone I already knew prior to my arrival with whom I could meet up.

Whatever the outcome, good luck with your future arrangements! What were you doing before your Visiting Fellow appointment in 2003? I seem to recall a red panda saying he dropped by to see you in Singapore, and that was in September 2001.

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

I was rather hoping we'd meet up too, but given my awful success in trying to get into Malaysia (apart from hovering over the National Railway) I would have to wait for you to get to Singapore. Maybe I'll be lucky with one of the still-existing applications -- one of the other universities in town asked my references for their opinions of me, and that's a tenure-track position, so if the world were really funny just for me I could be back in August. Certainly I'd love it if I could be.

Before being a Visiting Fellow, I was a mere ordinary grad student; but my thesis adviser took his sabbatical year in Singapore, and got me funding to tag along for two-thirds of 2001 and for one-third of 2002 on that contract. I didn't get an office or subsidized housing, but I did get to room with a nice Indian family and learn some of Singapore through life in a private condo.