And if they should bar wars

[austin_dern]

How can you not love a DVD store named Laser Flair? Besides the name, they had the Star Wars: The Trilogy People Actually Like set, with each movie on three of the four monitors¹. I didn't buy it, since I think George Lucas shouldn't have fired the guy with the axe who's supposed to chase him away when it's done. They still haven't got Han looking anywhere near Jabba in the the Correctly-Cut-In-1977 scene. I realized the core of Death Star II looks a lot like the core of the Master Control Program. The mall's celebration of antiseptic cleaners (I swear) was too loud to hear if the Ewok Celebration is still the Sesame Street theme. And they edited the Final Jedi Ghost scene so Irritating Whiny Schmuck Annakin is with Yoda and Obi-Wan, even though Luke still reveals Darth Vader under the mask is Uncle Fester. Whiny Schmuck looks way creepier and more menacingly evil than Jedi Fester, too.

Their Robo Corn, alas, seems to be closed. There was a new kiosk not in the same spot, Strudel House, which just screams ``Southeast Asian Cuisine'' because they have durian strudel. The mind reels, staggers out of the mall, comes back in, looks again, and still can't believe it.

¹ The other monitor had a Scooby-Doo movie with Shaggy and Creepy CGI Scooby stumbling into a transformation story, gulping down bright liquids and transforming in too-quick-to-be-enjoyable wobbles into eggplant monsters, women, and buff millerwolf-style hulks. That's not going to make me break my Scooby Boycott.

Trivia: The Sunday, 17 October 1965 issue of The New York Times was 946 pages long, and weighed approximately seven and a half pounds. Source: 1982 Guinness Book of World Records, Norris McWirther.

Currently Reading: A Wodehouse Bestiary, P.G. Wodehouse.

Comments

[bunny-hugger.livejournal.com]

I can't believe he did that actor-swapping thing. Ugh. Wasn't it bad enough that he had Greedo shoot at Han Solo from point blank range and miss? Why doesn't he just burn the negatives and call a "do-over" on the whole thing?

How can Lucas fail to realize what an idiot he's being?

[austin-dern.livejournal.com]

I suppose I feel a touch of whatever Lucas feels; I'm a compulsive editor -- hard as I try, for example, I can't seem to send something here without calling it back for one or two little trims -- and it's hard to read something really old that I wrote without thinking of what to revise. But, sheesh, at some point you have to decide it's done, and you're going to go on and do something new instead of drowning yourself in second thoughts.

There's also some kind of bizarre loss of perspective in not recognizing that Han shooting first is a good, succinct, dramatic and exciting establishment of character and can't be improved. Or, in the newest dumbness, not seeing that adding to the Hall of Dead Jedis the arrogant and repulsive schmuck who is about to turn into the cruelest villain of history is not morally preferable to having the repentant, redeemed Vader who did beat the dark side there.

Guy with an axe, to chase him off when the movie's done, that's what he needs.